Behind the Music

A few weeks ago I stumbled onto Clever Girl Goes Blog, and she had made a mixtape of the songs of her life. I thought it was a great idea but never got around to it.

Then Music Week at Material Girl came into my life. Well, actually, I brought Music Week into my life, so maybe it was a subconscious way of getting this mixtape made. Plus, this marks my 50th post, so I figure a summation of my life through music is probably a fitting tribute.

I totally underestimated the difficulty of this assignment. 27 years of music and memories narrowed down to 13 songs. Impossible. Then, I realized it’s my blog and my mixtape, and I can do whatever I want to. If I was a real rockstar (not just one in my head), I would totally make albums with more than 13 songs. I’m awesome like that. I chose the number 15, but it was still really hard. Especially since I proclaim a new “Most Favorite Song Ever” at least twice a month.

Here it goes. In no particular order, the songs that I love, the songs that take me back to a certain time, and the songs that made me into who I am today.

Damn, I Wish I Was Your Lover – Sophie B. Hawkins: I loved this song as a kid (still love it). As a 10 year old, I realized that it was “adult”, and that my parents wouldn’t want me to love this song. So I loved it even more. It made me feel rebellious and independent. I could make decisions without my parents. Shocking discovery.

Cradle of Love – Billy Idol: This song had the same effect as I Wish I Was Your Lover. It was sexy and provocative. I’m beginning to think that I have some authority issues. Defying my parents was high on my list of priorities. I was getting close to my adolescent years, and the need to be an individual was foremost in my life.

I’ll Be There for You – Bon Jovi: Oh, Bon Jovi, how you made me wish I was older. I thought it was so romantic. I thought it was the way guys talked to girls they loved all the time. I couldn’t wait to be old enough to hear words like that from a guy. I still get all tingly when I hear it.

Don’t Stop Believing – Journey: It’s Journey. Enough said, right. No matter how many times I hear this song, I can’t help but get all fired up and ready to take on the world. And it reminds me of Kaeli's dad, Ryan, which is alway nice.

Don’t Take the Girl – Tim McGraw: My dad was in the Army. We moved a lot. We lived in New Jersey for a while, and my goal was to spend the rest of my life as a Yankee. I blame my youth. When my dad told me we were moving to the South (Georgia then Texas), I thought I was going to die. I swore I would hate them forever, I swore I would never say y’all (that obviously didn’t stick), and I swore I would never listen to country music. Then my 8th grade BFF, Christina (I wonder what ever happened to her), played this song for me. My entire view of country music changed. ( i just seriously teared up watching the video)

Papa Don’t Preach – Madonna: Y’all knew there was going to be at least 1 Madonna song on my list, right. It’s pretty obvious that I was young when I had Kaeli. I found out I was pregnant when I was 20. I was absolutely beyond terrified of telling my dad. It literally took me months and 3 separate attempts. Not because I thought he would be mad or disown me, but because I was so scared that he would be disappointed in me. Scared that he would think I failed. (He didn’t by the way. He was nothing but super supportive and awesome) Anyway, as a joke with my friends, this became my anthem. I would drive around blasting this song, gaining courage from Madonna.

Baby Got Back – Sir Mix A Lot: There have been way too many instances of me drunkenly yelling “OMGTHISISMYJAM” for it not to be included. To put it delicately, I have a rather prominent backside. It has been like this my whole life. My aunt called me bubble butt at the age of 9. Fortunately, Sir Mix A lot, Jennifer Lopez, and Kim Kardashian have made having an ample derriere fabulous.

Cryin’ – Aerosmith: Who didn’t want to be Alicia Silverstone in the mid 90s? Plus, I’ve always had this weird lusty crush on Steven Tyler. Don’t judge.

You Oughta Know – Alanis Morrisette: Marks the beginning of my angry girl rock phase. I was fully into my overly emotional teen years. Everyone (by everyone I mean my parents) was out to get me, and I had to look out for myself!

Just a Girl – No Doubt: I must have listened to Tragic Kingdom a million times. I believe I went through 2 copies due to over usage. Gwen Stefani was (is) so cool. So confident.

Criminal – Fiona Apple: I used to drive around in my dad’s Thunderbird blasting this song like crazy. Why I idolized a song about a girl treating her boyfriend badly I have no idea, but I thought the character in the song was so sexy and mysterious and bad. Everything I wasn’t, but thought it would be cool if I was. Again, I blame youth.

Every You Every Me – Placebo: I first heard this song on the Cruel Intentions (one of my fav movies) soundtrack. It’s been on my top favorites list ever since. I don’t have a story or a reason, but I just love it. I saw Placebo in concert last year with Linkin Park, and hearing them sing this song was awesome!!

Toxic – Britney Spears: Shush! Everyone is allowed a guilty pleasure or two (or 15). After work, in my waitressing/college days, my friends and I would head on over to another restaurant/bar that closed way later than ours. We’d proceed to drink away our night’s tips. Eventually, we’d get tipsy enough to play this song on the juke box and sing at the top of our lungs. I’m sure the other patrons really enjoyed it.

Something About the Way You Look Tonight – Elton John: Sigh. My mushy girly sappy side rears is ugly head.

Our Time Now – Plain White Ts: The most current addition to the list. I love this song. It’s so upbeat and fun. I first heard it during the early stages of dating Rob, so it reminds me of him and makes me happy. (There is that annoying sappy side again).

Bonus Tracks: (because I can’t even follow rules I set for myself) These are the ones that almost made the list. I have no explanation for loving them. No great story. I just love them.
I Want You to Want Me – Cheap Trick
You Don’t Own Me – Joan Jett (couldn't find Joan Jett so I got Bette Midler...she sang it in First Wives Club!!)
Against All Odds – Phil Collins
Heartbreaker – Pat Benetar
Step by Step - New Kids on the Block (duh)

This might actually be a therapeutic list for me. First, can you tell I was a teenager in the 90s??!! Reading it back, I was a much more angst ridden teenager than I thought. I should probably immediately call my parents and apologize. If it’s true that “you reap what you sew”, I need to find away to stop Kaeli from getting any older. I don’t think I can handle when she gets to her Rage Against the Mom phase.

I'm pretty sure this list will change and evolve as I get older and have more life experiences. (not that I can even imagine experiencing more than I already have) Besides the ability to transport me into a different place and time, I think my favorite thing about music is that there is always a song to express how I'm feeling better than I can.

So, anyone else want to share your mixtape?