I Hope You Have Some Time and a Full Beverage because It's a Long One

I feel like I have been seriously neglecting my poor little blog. It feels like I have so much to write about, but then I sit down to do it and nothing comes to mind! There kind of is a reason, but that's a different post for a different day.

(I'm so mysterious and intriguing, aren't I?)

So I guess y'all get a rambling, no clear point to it, catch up post.

Rambling #1
A couple weeks ago, Rob and I took Kaeli to Sea World for a little End of 1st Grade and Congrats on Being a Totally Awesome Kid Celebration. I hadn't actually been before, so I might have been just as excited as Kaeli. I planned on having 87 million pictures to show everyone, but I'm a genius and forgot to charge my camera. We ended up buying Ridiculously Overpriced Disposable Cameras at the gift shop. (Which I had totally forgotten how to use. Winding up and holding the flash and not being able to tell if I have a weird look on my face after taking a picture is so 1998!) The problem with Ridiculously Overpriced Disposable Cameras is that you have to actually take them somewhere and get them developed. Which means that the Ridiculously Overpriced Disposable Cameras will probably sit on my counter until the end of summer.

The problem with Sea World is that now I sit in my cubicle thinking that I missed my calling in life. I SO should have become a dolphin trainer. There was this dolphin feeding area where we bought trays of fish and got to STAND RIGHT NEXT TO DOLPHINS AND FEED THEM. It was my favorite part of the day. They're so friendly and cute. I felt like an excited little kid. I forgot how much I loved dolphins when I was younger until I was literally inches from one. I might have gone through 6 trays of fish and had to be reminded (more than once) to share by my 6 year old daughter.

The Sea World trip wasn't all sunshine and happy dolphins. I also realized, more than ever, that guys are seriously ridiculous. No really. They can't help it. And by guys I mean Rob and the Minivan Driver at the Sea World Entrance. Stay with me here because it's going to get super run-on sentence like. The park opened at 10am, so you can imagine that at 10:22am the entrance was beyond crowded. First, there was an area to pay for parking, and then the 3 lanes merged to 2 lanes. Rob and I were in the far lane and needed to merge. Everyone was following proper crowded park merging etiquette. You know, the whole each car lets one car in thing. It was our turn to merge. Rob was driving, and I notice that the Minivan driver was not going to let us in, and it would be better to wait for the next car. I tell this to Rob, but Macho Man Syndrome sets in and he becomes DETERMINED to merge at this EXACT moment. Rob and Minivan Driver do the whole keep scooting up until someone gives in thing, and my voice is increasing in volume because we're in my new car and seriously what is the point of acting like an idiot. Then, the Minivan driver starts honking and calling Rob a motherf*cker, which I thought was really classy seeing as how all of us have kids in the car and his minivan had a Christian Fish Symbol on it. Finally, Rob backs down and lets the Minivan driver win, but I was totally pissed. It was completely ridiculous behaviour, right? Does it really matter if we are behind or in front of the minivan. There are HUNDREDS of cars in line. We are all going to the same place. It's going to take some time and patience!!! Plus was the little display of macho-ness really worth pissing me off and ruining what was a very nice and peaceful morning? Guys + Cars + Long Lines = Unbelievably Childish Behaviour.

Ok. Rant over. Thanks to those of y'all who made it through that story!

Rambling #2
One of my very favorite people in the whole wide world is moving very far away, and I'm super sad about it. My BFF's (I call her P-squared) hubby is in the Air Force and got orders to go to Germany for the next 4 years. I'm super excited for her because traveling Europe = Awesome, but I am so bummed that I won't be able to see her whenever I want. We've lived with in weekend visiting distance forever. Of course there will be visiting, but how realistic is it to think that we will see each other even once a year? And how the hell does international text messaging work? Is there even a plan for that because OMG what am I going to do if I can't text her 50 times a day? P^2 has a son, M, that is a few weeks younger than Kaeli. Kaeli and M have been super close since they were in the womb! It's so weird that for the next four years I won't be able to see him growing up. Not to mention that her and the hubby have been trying to have another baby, and the thought that they could come back to the states with a little P^2 who I don't know is heartbreaking.

Rambling #3
This conversation took place between the sons of P^2 and another friend. Both boys are 6.

J: Hey, M do you know Kaeli?
M: Yeah. She's kind of my cousin*.
J: She's really pretty.

* M calls Rob uncle, even though Rob isn't his actual uncle. M is convinced that if Rob and I ever get married, he and Kaeli will be cousins.

How effing cute is all of that? This age is fun.

Rambling #4
If you follow me on Twitter (kristi_kp...but why would you because I'm awfully boring) then you know I revealed a shameful secret. I have this strange desire to read Lauren Conrad's book LA Candy. I can't even explain why. You can stop wanting to be my friends now. I understand.

I could keep rambling. It's one of my specialties, but I think y'all have been through enough torture. I totally get it if you just skimmed.

On a side note, I feel so much better getting all of this out there. I really shouldn't take accidental blogging breaks anymore!!